complete amebo work!!!

hey y'all today am completely gonna mebo about a friend of mine n i pray that he never get to read this sha even though am blogging with his laptop...anyho this friend of mine is more than a friend to me he is more like a brother and i love him to bits in a good way ooooooooooooooo!!!!!(all u dirty minded peeps)

neways he has a girlfriend in naija n they been together for a bit but guys must be guys he dey play away games from time time if u get my drift...the gist of the day however is something that has been making me laff all morning n i just thot to share!!!!
he has this rather older girl that really fancies him n she came over yesterday and they were in the room together all thru dont ask me ooo cos i dont knw wat they were up to probably sharing the word of God!!!!!!!
well he leaves for uni this morning and when i wake up i get a text on my fone on how he wants meto get rid of the girl as she was still in the house...aha which kin assignment be that one ooooo this early morning...welll i go to the living room and wat did i c? the girl is there using my WOK to warm her left over chinese!!!wahala dey ooooo.... then she goes to me 'hello ada i was gonnna come ask u how to go about using the cooker and how to turn on the tv but i guessed u were still sleepin' (u guessed rite i was still sleepin cos if u had come close to my door na flying kick i for give u i swear) urs truly helps her with the stove and the tv and i return to my room oooo n then i sent a text to my darling friend about how comfy his guest seems to be in the flat mehn the boi wan craze for class sha n he begs me to get rid of her!!!!!ok ooo being the good friend that i am i go back to the living room to see wat i can do and madam has taken a very very comfy position on the couch and is flipping thru the tv channels while she chats on the fone, ha wahala this ine no dey comot anywhere oo n how i wan take shape my mouth drive her away abeg bros go try do that one when he returns from uni...

meanwhile a little birdie just whispered in my ears that some sales is going on at the topshop so urs truly gats to get ouuta bed now, take a shower n hit the streets to see fo rmyself wat the streets r sayin!!!!!
am audi for now..
enjoy the rest of the week..

ciao!!!!

am i makin the right move!!!!

hey sorry for the silence apart from the fact that i cant stay without blogging about man my abacus has taken a turn for the worst but God dey i go replace am very soon by his grace.
to the topic of the day, prior to this week the plan was to renew my status and get the 2 year work permit but today i am shopping like ts going outta fashion why? because urs truly is moving back to naija in the next two weeks!!!!! very random i know and am so scared am not makin the right choice but given the circumstances i really have no choice or say in this matter.

Ok lemme explain, i been in the UK for over 4 years now n have worked for about 9months outta of this 4 years, how have i been surviving? good question..... i happen to have one of the best mums in the world who outta her very little has catered for me over this years n i have never lacked i even live and spend better than people whp have jobs guess thats because i dont work for the money!!!! well my luck!!!
anyho, i finished in may and since then i have not gotten any reasonable or even unreasonable job dont ask me why oooo cos i cant really answer that right now..
the bottomline is think its time i be useful and help my mum out a little since i cant get a job here in the UK i may as well take this time out amd go and serve my country!!!

the problem now is that i dont know if i am making the right decision really, would i miss the life i have been used to and all that!!!!
am so confused oooo but am sure i would be fine its probably just fear of the unknown and all that!!!
do u think its a good idea or am i making a mistake?
help me ooooo pls!!!!

see no man in this post i told u!!!! hehehehehe!!!

i too like man sha!!!!

first let me apologise for my older posts that seem not to have the letter 'i' in certain words, it so happens that my 4 years old abacus as it s referred to by people who beleive i should throw it away n get a new one anyways my abacus refuses to type the letter 'i' most times n am tired of trying to press hard to get it to type cos e dey too wound my artificial nails!!!

anyways let me move on to the topic of the day, i just realised that my every post has a man or a story of one man or another in it sha na wa ooooo na so i like man reach but hold on f i no like man who i come like na woman??????????????????? some peeps like woman sha but hey them no get those strong arms that when i am in i feel like i have no troubles n the world, or their very husky sexy voices and how loud it gets when they get upset or the fact that u just feel very safe around them cos of their masculine presence and most importantly according to the koko master himself 'the koko', i accept nothing else for this world sweet reach 'the koko' oooooo!!!!!!!! abi i lie?????????????

so for my next few posts am gonna try hard no to talk about man n see if i would survive it oooo cos e go hard!!!!!!
did i mention i love my boyfriend very much. o ok of course i do love him very much cos he makes me very happy but as always em self get em own buts!!!

am out for now...
ciao...

weight loss time!!!

Let me start by sayin that i have never really been a skinny person all my life that i remember since i ten dto be suffering from amnesia these days and so i have always been comfortable in my big body!!!
i rememeber i prmary school i used to be bigger than most of my mates n the same goes for high school, i also had this trade mark which am sure most people would remember before they evn remembered my name n that my BUM!!!(OOPS AM SHY NOW)...

anyways urs truly s really addin some unwanted weight n i knw that it is time to get rid of it all for the first i am really bothered about my weight because loads of people have been complainng n the one that hurt me most was when my oga sad to me n i quote ''tweetie the last time i saw u ur thighs were not this big ooooo i think we need to do something about it'' ehen e don happen i got a major shocker and i am tryin my best to work on the weight loss program whch isnt very easy i must admit but i dont want my oga to start looking at all those slim young girls ooo biko as man is scarce in the market rigt now..

na so urs truly start diet oo fish, chicken, eggs, leaves and more leaves....water, water n no fizzy drinks at all!!! i go die..n then i go say make i try join gym na so dem tell me £95 to join n trust me i said to the guy that i would be back the next day!!!! i have not been able to bring myself to go n register there oo cos its cost oooooooooooo!!!

pls peeps should donate to my cause so that i dont loose my man oooooo!!!

credit crunch et all!!!!

Hey ths lazy child s here again ooo n this tme its to gossip small about what happened yesterday oooooo!!! i don spoil no be small thing sha!!
anyways in high school i had a friend wh lived opposite some really cool boys n we all used to play together even though they were older than us and i was so young.. but i had my eye on one of them but as usual he used to look at me like his younger sis or so i want to think!!!
anyways thanks to the new communication enhancer called FB p.s that mark guy is making so much monies from out unnecessary addiction to his site sha tory for anoda day..
so we found ourselves on fb recently n we have been chattin on n off well he says he is in london and we decided to meet up for lunch abi drinks me i dont knw which one to call it...
typically naija i would say but he says he had to sort his very hyper active niece out he was late so i took my tme to window shop as urs truly is very broke at the moment.. well he met me up in the shops n we went into a few more shops together before we decided to go for a meal at nandos where i had a really nice ceasar salad since i don turn goat wey dey chop leaf as a result of tryin to shed some excess fat n the system..
after the meal i started to feel some kind of electric shock vibes going on btw us n at the station he leaned so close to me i knew he wanted to kiss me but he withdraw n i was so cursing hm under my breath...anywas we got on the train n decided to get off at the westend n c wat soho had to offer that evenin..
got some coffee cos it was getting chilly (london bulls&*t weather)n then he does what he should have done like years back n i said to him wat took u so long??????????? it was a beautiful kiss n then a wonderful evening cos we strolled like lovers (even though we r not as yours truly has a boyfriend who she is so in love with at the mo but mehn a girl is allowed some distraction once in a while) through soho, leicester square n finally trafalgar square where my big body started to ache n i decided it was time to call it a night.

i had so much fun and i dont regret that kiss at all cos its really been a whle i had such long walk at night like tourists do (now i understand y oyins too dey go holiday)..

i don mebo small for today, meanwhile wat is up wth this credit cruch wahala everyday its a new company last week it the tourist airlin XL airlins n today its the 4th biggest investment bankers in the US lehman brothers takin up the bankruptcy protection so that they can organise themselves n pay up their debtors within a period of time n my Merill lynch has been bought over by bank of Americe for £50 billion...
Na only baba God go ft save us...

p.s i got a temp job at the mo which i enjoy so am not jobless afterall..
gats to run now...stay blesse n have a blessed weekend...

ciao!!!

jobless graduate!!!!

ok now my laziness has really taken a dive for the worse, i am practically on the internet 24-7 but i dont have the patience to sit down and start to type all thislong blog sturves ooo!!!

well like the title suggests i am a very jobless graduate n its killing me cos the boredom is driving me insane...all i do is eat, sleep n eat again n then finally go to bed at night, am so scared that i dont burst very soon cos my oga would soon start to complain.
anyways my jobless situation in obodo oyibo is really making me have a rethink on moving back to my country, Nigeria may not be the best country to live in but its opportunities are abound especially with its new take on investments and openings in every sector i am really sincerely considering moving back to serve my country and eventually take up a permanent position back home!!!!!

i really dont know if am making the right decision but in this my jobless situation and numerous failed interviews i think i would just go back to my beloved country and make some thing out of my degree...

its so crazy how employer expect a fesh graduate to have 5 years experience in their field when they have been in full time studies, besides how do i get that experience if you are not willing to employ an and train me...mehn i just tire sha..

i need directions at this point in my life trusting that i am making the right decisions..

i have slept all day but i feel sleepy again so am gonna have to ex now n i do promise(pinky promise) to write more often since i really do not have anything else i do..
ciao!!!!

random....

lets c wat should we talk about now??????????????
k i love n really appreciate my friends but when they turn around and snitch on me it really really pisses me off and being the vindictive person i am i really never forget or forgive completely until i get squared with them...
i have this friend n she has messed with me one too many times n i cant seem to figure out how to get back at her...
any evil suggestions will be candidly welcome and appreciated oooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!

exams, exams are here oooooo so i need to get off here now n try n get sum studying which i dont seem to do very well this days since am so hooked on to the TV...
ciao!!!!!!!!!!!1

12 TYPES OF FEMALE

hey here are twelve types of females which one r u ladies n guys which one would u rather be with....
enjoy

1. Ms. Gold-Digger

Advantages
a. You have someone to manage your money.
b. She always looks good.
c. She makes your other boys jealous.
d. She makes you look good.

Disadvantages
a. When you get broke she'll be gone and take what you have left.
b. She makes sure she has a child by you to sue you for child support.
c. Once your boy comes up she'll be on his arm the next day.


2. Ms. Freak (secret lover)

Advantages
a. She knows all the right positions.
b. She'll try everything more than once.
c. You're never unsatisfied.
d. She'll do all the things your girl won't do.
e. She doesn't mind being your freak, as long as she catches one too.

Disadvantages
a. Eventually, because she's a female, she'll end up catching feelings.
b. She starts to act like she's your "main".
c. She messes with ya boy and act like you in the wrong for telling that she's a freak.
d. Eventually her stuff gets old. And you need a replacement.



3. Ms. Independent

Advantages
a. You don't have to worry about buying her anything. She got it.
b. She's intelligent, sassy, confident and determined.
c. She's great for (business) conversation.
d. She keeps it real and has goals.
e. She knows how to please a man.

Disadvantages
a. She will continuously let you know, that she can handle it on her own.
b. She will eventually say forget you and get a dildo.
c. She will consider you another one her play toys, or goals.


4. Ms. Dyme

Advantages
a. She's top of the line.
b. She stays looking like a fantasy.
c. She has the body of a goddess with the face to match.
d. She considers herself a "model"
e. All the girls envy her, but she doesn't care.

Disadvantages
a. She's superficial. She cares only about her looks.
b. She honestly lacks confidence and will annoy you about the way she looks.
c. She's probably dumb as hell and if she's not her personality is dry.
d. You have to constantly keep your game up because every kat is gonna try to get her.




5. Ms. Tomboy

Advantages
a. She's cool and laid back.
b. She'll be willing to play rough with you.
c. Of course, she loves sports.
d. Her body is athletically divine.
e. She's easy to talk to and fun to be around.
f. She's a diamond in the rough.

Disadvantages
a. She'll remind you too much of your boy.
b. She might not want to change her appearance.
c. She might actually beat you in basketball, football and track.


6. Ms. Ghetto

Advantages
a. She's not afraid of any other female or male. She will fight to keep you.
b. She's down for you. She'll be there to bail you out of jail.
c. She's always stays fresh.
d. She can cook up a storm. She can make the best out of a bad situation.
e. She keeps it real and keeps you satisfied.

Disadvantages
a. She doesn't know how to act in public.
b. Your mom can't stand her.
c. You get into it with her every other second.
d. She's willing to fight another girl looking at you PERIOD!!!!.
e. Her weave colors are distracting and her vocabulary is minimal .



7. Ms. Good Girl

Advantages
a. She's always there for you.
b. She's intelligent, classy, kind, sweet and cool.
c. Your mother loves her.
d. You can see yourself falling in love with her.
e. You are her first everything.
f. She makes you feel like a man.
g. 8/10 you will be her first sex partner

Disadvantages
a. She's an A or B situation either: A. You're not gonna get any until ya'll are married or she will make you wait A LONG TIME or at least till he feel like you really like her and not just tryin to get some.. or.... B. She said she never done it she said she never tried she's sitting there telling a lie.


8. Ms. Main

Advantages
a. She is the one you respect.
b. She probably may know about the others but might not care.
c. She has all the qualities you want in a female.
d. You've been with her forever.

Disadvantages
a. She starts getting very suspicious and calls you every moment.
b. She will devise a plan to catch you in your act and then kick your ass.


9. Ms. Psycho

Advantages
a. She's fun and spontaneous.
b. She's down to earth.
c. She loves you unconditionally.
d. Everything about her is too good to be true. So everyone loves her.
e. She makes you feel loved.

Disadvantages
a. Don't you break up with her. She will stalk your ass.
b. She keeps pictures of you everywhere and knows everything about you.
c. She can manipulate the hell out of you.
d. She will consider herself wifey even if she may just be that chick on the side.
e. Messing with her can make your life a living hell.

10. Ms. I have a Man.

Advantages
a. She may have a man but she'll mess with you anyway.
b. She looks good.
c. You have an intense night of passion with her.

Disadvantages
a. She'll always come crying to you about the problems with her man.
b. She'll get you caught up and then leave you anyway for her man.
c. If you piss her off she'll get her man to come beat your ass.
d. She'll unofficially make you her man once she gets pissed off at her real man.


11. Ms. Tease

Advantages
a. She's tempting and a nice piece of eye candy.
b. She's intelligent, athletic, respectable and SEXXXXXXY.
c. She knows how to turn you on without touching you.
d. Everything she does is just so sensual.
e. She can bring you to that point and make you wait to get it.
f. Every time you see her you catch a mini orgasm.
g. Every kat wants her cause she's so mysterious and that makes you want to get her first.

Disadvantages
a. NO matter what you think or do you never get it.
b. She probably has a long distance boyfriend somewhere that you will never know about.
c. She gets you hard and leaves you like that. (Unbearable)


12. MRS. RIGHT

Advantages
a. She is not sexy, fine, or a dyme but she is BEAUTIFUL and therefore encompasses all of these descriptions.
b. She is intelligent, sassy, funny, outgoing, determined, strong and classy.
c. She can cook or at least order a meal that is just like your mother's.
d. Her personality is just as beautiful as her body.
e. She believes in God and follows his virtues.
f. She knows that a relationship requires a 200% quota yet she gives her man an extra 10%.
g. She can please her man in anyway. Mentally, Spiritually, and Sexually.
h. She makes you recognize your full potential as a man and completes you.
i. She's always there for, no matter what your dreams are.
j. She's not afraid to tell you the truth and set you straight.
k. You can talk to her and confide in her, she's your best friend.
l. You love being around her more than your boys.
m. You can share your most intimate moments with her without sex.
n. You can have a bad argument with her and then have the BEST Mind Numbing and passionate love making fest ever.
o. She's always willing to find a way to work out your problems and will often take most of your shit. But she's also intelligent enough to leave.
p. She's nothing like any other girls you've met. She's your woman. THE RIGHT ONE

Disadvantage: You've probably met her, or had her in your life but got too consumed with Mrs 1- Mrs 11 that you let her go !

ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A ngelic appearance which may sometimes be deceptive..

B abe 4 life

C harismatic and very competitive.....love challenges so much as well as caring

D etermined

E nergetic very very especially after some bottles of ribena n u knw what....lol

F orgetful (very very forgetful neva remember anything anymore)
runners up: fashion sista,fabulous n flirty

G od fearing....am very glad with my personal relationship with GOD

H omebody love to chill at home with friends, have a laff, drinks, watch movies n generally have fun within the four walls of my home

I nteresting babe neva a dull moment with this chic trust me

J ealous lover yes i am n am not sorry

K onvict album lover

L oving and loves easily (bad i knw but i cant help it)

M ummy's girl (cant do without my mum speak to her everyday)

N aija lo wa proudly naijan no doubt

O rganiser (organise peeps parties but no one ever helps organise mine hisssss0

P erfectionist (cant stand delibrate flaws)

Q ueen (african queen to be precise according to TU BABA)

R espectful and resourceful

S sarcastic and saucy when needed

T omboy (strictly converses and flats high heels make me wanna fall down)

U niversity graduate in the making

V verstile and vibrant

W inger ( i happen to winge alot so he says well wat can i say)
runner up:wonderful cook (dont f**k)

X mas faithful i love the feeling of xmas (the birth, gifts, food n more food)

Y oung

Z beats me am lost for words for this one abeg........

am back!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok i have no clue as to wat i am about to write but i have neglected this blog for far too long n i think its only fair i write sum down..
lets see, ok i just broke up with Mr. J about 2 weeks ago n he is in nigeria getting himself some naija loving (who cares????) anyhow my friend introduces me to his brother and he has been a major distraction for me so i really do not feel any emotional wahala after my break up...i miss him small sha!!!!!!
this guy lets call Y is so cool asides the fact that he swears alot, i really really like him oooooo but em get MRS. ok not as in wife ooo but girlfriend. let me give u guys the gist, you know when u meet sumone and u think all you want is just his company and dont really care about anything else..thats wat happened to urs truly ooooo i knew he had a mrs but she isnt in england so i just thot lets just keep ourselves comapny and help me get over my breakup and sturves like that..
well about 10 days ago he says he was disappearing for a bit and am wondering where is it this time cos he is always on the move and he drops the bombshell "my mrs. is coming to town"...OMG wat the heck r u talking about, well i act clamly like ok that cool meanwhile i don dey cry for inside my mind ooooooo..........
anyhow he says nothing changes and for a minute i thot y am i feeling bad afterall i knew all this but mehn common am only human n i do like this guy sha..
wat do i do...i still see him sha n i dont think he has gone to see her yet though but he is disappearing again this nite n i sure am gonna miss him..
life goes on they say...

on a lighter note i wanna wish everyone a wondderful new year ahead and i pray that the new year holds better and great things for each and everyone of us...
God bless...
i promise to be here more often AMEN...(i seriouls need to overcoome this laziness oooooo)
ciao...

so called work

ok i kinda work for my uncle (my auntys husband) but i hardly do anything n get paid...
so i leave the house every day with my uncle n i dont get to leave till he is ready (he could be at the office for 24 hrs if he is allowed) n this is beginning to get on my nerves i swear...
about this guy at work oh my God is so cute n he is single (the only single guy at work) damnnnnnnnnnnn but this is wrong cos am meant to have a boyfriend i think i love n then sometimes i dont knw wat i feel for him.
God help me ooooooooooooooo n deliver me from temptation cos if he makes a move me i go flirt oooooooooooooo after all there is no harm in a little harmless flirting abi?????????????????
i have plenty gist but am too lazy to type it now so stay tuned or lose out on the gist all u amebooooosssssssssss......
i think my uncle is finally ready to leave after their senior office jokesssssss am not allowed to hear cos he is married to my aunty (skeletons in the closet ooooooooooooooooooo na wa) abeg i no talk anything sha...
ciaooooooooooo

i dont knw wat to call this

ok am meant to be on holiday but am working cos i need to mak some money to be spent...
ok its my uncles mortagage company and its quite fun working here cos they r so friendly n we r like one big family...
besides i like one of the guys at work but i have a boyfriend in quote story for anoda day..

am excited

i have a cinema date with my friend n her boyfriend tomoro.....
finally i get to go out with someone since i gat here yipeeeee am so excited and am really looking forward to that....
will fill u in on how it goes....
am out cos its 1.33am n i should be in deep slumber...
ciao

really random

heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy....
its like forever since i last blogged cos yours truly is very lazy (something i have to overcome thru he who strengthens me)....anyways guess am back and am gonna try to blog more often...

i leave in london but am in the states at the moment on holiday for a long while...prior to my visit i was so excited cos i was coming to meet family i havent seen in a while especially my one n only beloved brother n my newly acquired brothers and sisters, nieces n nephews(thanks to my mums new union)...
anyways my flight was for 9.15 in the morning n my oga (lets call him mr. J for future references) comes to pick me by 5am to take me to the airport cos he has to hurriedly drop me off n then n head for work n make all the money for both of us....
am dressed, packed n ready when he gets to mine n i could not stop talking about the trip..
get to the airport, check in after so much hassle cos of the color of my passport(very depressing trust me abeg make i do marry this guy change the color jo) n then go thru security checks and all and some duty free shopping (highlights of travellin) constantly checkin for my gate number and boarding time cos it was changed...
10 hours n we r finally at JFK yours truly was glad 2 hrs away to my final destination n the bombshell " all flights to BWI have been cancelled please go to delta airlines help desk to reschedule" OMG am stuck where do i start from, so i follow my fellow travellers n join the massive queue and after about 50mins its my turn,"am sorry ma'am but the next flight is fully booked but we can put u on standby n then confirm u for tomoro" that seemed fine n then i left the desk feeling satisfied...
7.30pm "all flights to BWI have been cancelled please go n rebook" WTF wat is going here am going crazy from hunger and tiredness anyways i start to call my family n i get my kid broda to send his friend over to pick me....
bottom line however i get to maryland the next day after a series of other cancelled flights n a flight to anoda airport not my original destination.
i get maryland n my luggage isnt here yet good thing cos i gat to go shopping immediately as everyone was feeling really sorry for wat i had gone thru..
am in maryland and getting bored though
abeg is this the america or is there still anoda i am not seeing abeg help me out here oooooooo...

i will keep u posted on my sojourn here in Gods own country n try to blog more often...
am out

a quick one

oops just a quick one..
do we really believe in love at first sight..men me i dont ooooooooooo
ok then here is a recent or rather ongoing i really dont know wat to call it so i will let u figure that out urself..
i met this guy and we went on a date two days ago...i never met him before we only spoke on the phone so on the d day i did not know wat to expect but trust i was praying hard that he does not turn out to be shrek look a like..
prayers do work he was no shrek look alike...
dinner went well..italian resturant candle lite cool music playing(it felt romantic i wont lie oooooooooo)..
afetr dinner he dropped me home and was quite forward he forced himself into my house and almost practically refused to leave..
when he finaly did he called me almost immediately and was on the phone for a rather long time really saying nothing(for crying out loud he just left me barely 5 mins b4 he called k i guess its my charm)
he calls me the next day he wants to come over...wat was i to say i found all the excuses but in the end he won and he came over...
dont get me wrong i like his company but i think its a little too much n i dont fancy bugaboo's..
he also happens to be quite a cheapskate complaining about very triffle expenses like how he cant go to drycleaners,buy bottled water when he has got a tap,buy a freakin navigator for crying out (guess he enjoys constantly getting lost and asking for directions always like a freakin idiot...
anyways today he said he was in love with me...how can that be he dont know me(he claims its love at first sight)..
me i dont believe in that ooooooooooooooooooooooo so its not going to work for him as urs truly likes some one else...
pls someone help me out here...
wat is love at first sight?????????????????????
abeg break it down to a sista's level..
gats to run again..
ciao..
i will keep u informed on his professed love at first sight

Today

hello everyone its d 12th of november 2006 1.20 am to be precise......up trying to round up a corporate finance coursework
lest i forget i am studying a degree in accounting and finance..
i have 4 pieces of work to hand in in 2weeks ad i really am not making headway...
i sit and ponder do we really need all the theoritical work and constant research to work in the real world after graduation..
i really do not think so...with the ever evolving technologcal world and all the software flying around.
that practically does the work for us so y dont dont we get taught how to work with the software than this continous manual torture..
i really have to run now so i can catch up on the work to be done but i promise to drop a word or two on regular basis..
am out for now